That night you walked me home I watched as you turned around to Walk down the road alone Never looking back.
Somewhere
Somewhere deep down inside my heart The spaces and places of my past hide Like coloured mist in glass bottles Sealing yesterday's secrets safe inside
Run like the wind
Monday, September 10, 2012
A song that i fell in love with a long time ago.. When i had nothing to run away from.
Now as I listen to the song and the lyrics, it seems to express very accurately the way I feel, in a way that I would never be able to clearly express myself with enough words.
But the irony is that running away was how I chose to face the reality of my life. It was by running away that I could face the chaos that was then. Yes, that is what I did. That is the true reason, and I tried to explain this so many times before - I ran away. I doubt that you'd ever understand this, but it doesn't really matter anymore. It is all in the distant past, so far away from today.
I often flashback to a day 5 years ago, when I was doing gym with my team mates in VJ. We took the mats out to courtyard outside the gym so that we could look up into the clear blue sky while we did our crunches and leg raises. I randomly posed a question, asking if anyone believed in first love. The consensus answer was no. But I was then a strong advocate of first love. And i declared with conviction, "I believe! and you all will be my bridesmaids when I get married" And we all burst out laughing.
When we were young, it never once occurred to us that things would not turn out the way that we had imagined it to. The me of the present, looks back on my younger self and I sense the difference. A part of me still wants to stubbornly hold on to my old naive ideals. But having since been proven wrong, the older me knows better- and thinks it wiser to just let go.
Here I talk to myself to make sense of things which didnt make
sense before. With the passage of time, some memories are distorted and
blurry but at the same time- things become clearer- as the story of our
lives unfold.
"Alice! a childish story take,
And with a gentle hand
Lay it where Childhood's dreams are twined
In Memory's mystic band,
Like pilgrim's wither'd wreath of flowers
Pluck'd in a far-off land."
